me: what’s for dinner?
her: *spreads her legs*
so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it.
o yea the 90s. the 90s were great. fuckin sick. raw as hell. learning how to speak. crying for no reason. shitting in my diaper
You are not a burden.
You are not a bother.
You enhance the lives of others.
People smile, not groan, when you text them.
This is honestly my favorite quote. It’s changed how I look at life and religion.
if you ever feel bad about yourself remember that george bush was once informed that 4 brazilian people were killed in iraq and he responded ‘how many is a brazilian’
The most dangerous types of alcohol are the ones that taste like juice so you don’t know when to stop until it’s too damn late
THATS THE SPIRIT